At times it seems as if I lead a double life. As I write this blog I am the acting “Mr. Mom”, while Jenna catches up (like she could ever make up completely) on lost sleep. Jason and I have read several books (some of them six times), had breakfast (no, I didn’t cook anything), had our diaper changed twice (that would be his, of course), and played with his toys and bubble-making machine. It’s cold, rainy, and nasty right now, so we’re not venturing out until after mom is up. I even got coffee ready for my wife so she’ll know how much I appreciate her. Hey, Princess Beckman just woke up-now I can devote myself to writing!

The double life I was referring to doesn’t have as much to do with watching the little man, as to my odd schedule and “job.” After all, how many people can say they are a professional racecar driver, and still get to spend Friday with their little reader? It still strikes me as odd that I will sometimes be on the road 20 plus days in one month, and then get to spend over a week at home just “catching up”. If you’re the nine-to-five type, this would drive you nuts in a hurry. (Editor’s note: Jack had to participate in a mandatory “read this book to me, and I think my diaper’s full again” session. He’s back now.)

Okay, I’m back. Jason is like a food processor right now; no sooner had I got the last of his breakfast in him when he started load-checking his diaper! Anyway, I feel very fortunate to be working at DSR and doing something that I love so much. (Racing, not the diaper thing).

As most of you already know, we missed qualifying for the second straight race, something that I never had (or thought I would have) experienced. It sucks, it’s intolerable, it’s demoralizing and every other nasty description one could think of. We work too hard to look this bad, and Don provides us with the best of everything. So why are we struggling? Good question, tough to answer.

As most of you already know (sounds just like the previous paragraph so far), Johnny West just came on board as crew chief. We changed LOTS of things on the car so that Johnny would be familiar with the tune up. Some may think changing so much was a mistake, but I definitely see the potential upside to it. Truth is, none of the DSR Funny Cars have been dominant yet this season, so it’s very possible that we need a different direction with the car, both tune up and philosophy-wise. That’s part of the reason that Johnny was brought in. Both he and Tommy have tuned well in the past, and their “out-of-the-box” approach (relative to the other three DSR cars) hopefully will take all four cars to the next level. Run one we smoked. Run two was conservative, and we ran a 4.93 at 318. Run three all the incremental numbers indicated a 4.80, and then we spun the tires at 865 feet. Odd, but there was some porous asphalt that didn’t have as much grip at that spot. When it spun, the numbers 3 and 5 cylinders “dropped”, causing the car to move hard towards the wall. At 1100 feet it was obvious the steering wheel wasn’t big enough (nor were my cahonies), and I clicked it. Had I been able to get it to the finish line without scraping the headers, we definitely could have been in, but hitting the wall isn’t worth the gamble. No excuses, we need to be better on Friday to get solidly into the show, and, though we tested on Monday, the track had changed so much that I’m not sure how much data we got. There are no other test opportunities before Topeka, so we need to be sharp from the time we unload.

Speaking of Monday testing, I also got to drive Gary Scelzi’s Mopar/Oakley Charger. Between the two cars I made five laps, and it was cool running back and forth. We had to take the seat insert out of Gary’s car, as I am too tall otherwise, but that made the harnesses pretty loose. We stuffed some padding between me and the seat belts, and it worked just fine. His car had a cup holder and one of those pine tree air fresheners.......cool.

I haven’t told you yet of my favorite part of the Bristol weekend. Saturday night 15 of us NHRA drivers were invited to participate in a stock car race over at the speedway. What a facility!! It was beyond impressive, and I can’t imagine 160,000 fans packing the stands for the Cup races. I also couldn’t imagine 500 laps around that place. We drove Street Stock cars, which were loads of fun and faster than they looked. The teams that donated their cars were obviously not aware of drag racer’s proclivity to NEVER LIFT (and never left). I just think it was beyond cool to let us beat up their equipment. To give you an idea, the car that I was driving is owned by Fred Taylor, Sr. and driven by Freddie, Jr. They blew up their “good” engine last week, but instead of pulling the plug on the race, they stuck a crate engine in just to be out there! Though the car was down about 75 horsepower, it still was plenty of excitement. Thanks to all of you who voted me on to the pole starting position, but that definitely isn’t the place to be if down on power. Allen Johnson got around me before the end of lap one, and Herbert got INTO me on lap two. It’s amazing how fast you can go from the pole to the tail-end in one of these cars! I also managed a 720 of sorts: I spun 360 one way, and then back the other. In fact, if you watch the ESPN drag coverage from Sunday, that would be ME in the #16 car showing off all four sides. Doug Herbert is doing his BRAKES (Be Responsible And Keep Everyone Safe) program nationwide as a tribute to his sons Jon and James, and it’s a wonderful thing. However, on the oval track I think his motto was, “Bump, Rub, And Keep Everyone Spinning”! I’m not sure who he didn’t hit, but it did make for some interesting racing. My car blew the power steering hose during the spin, and also started losing air from the right rear tire. I finished the 12-lap race, but by lap 8 or so I couldn’t see anything in front of me, as oil had covered my side of the windshield. I was able to look out the side window while in the turns, and had to guess at the straight-aways. I sincerely thank the Taylors and all of the other car owners (some who didn’t have much car left after we were done), and please sign me up for the next one!

Traveling itself isn’t as big a problem as the specifics of travel. Shuttles, packing, security, late departures and missed connections, long layovers, trying to sleep on the planes, rental cars, hotels, traffic, lines for the track, long drives to the track, wake up calls, appearances, getting lost, and a plethora of other things make a racer’s job exciting, not to mention when we get to drive. For the Bristol race, there is an airport only fifteen minutes from the track, which is heaven (if you can afford it). When we went to book my flight, one thousand dollars would have landed me there, saving lots of driving. I opted instead for the five hundred dollar flight and a 150 mile drive each way. Next race I may try hitch hiking to the track.

While I was on the road Jenna and Cindy took Jason to his weekly Gym practice, and he had a ball (or 300 of ‘em). We are so lucky to have Cindy available to help Jenna when I am away. Her sister Kathy is currently battling pancreatic cancer and is toughing out a very difficult situation. Please keep her in your prayers for a complete remission.

Once home I decided to tackle the transmission in the Nissan. Up until this point it had been pretty smooth sailing. Bolting the flywheel back up, aligning and tightening the clutch disk and pressure plate … piece of cake! The last time I put a clutch in a car was back in 1986 or 7, in my 1962 Chevy II with a straight six and a three speed on the column. I did it in the parking lot of the Air Force Base, and it was a bit@&! This one was going much better … until I tried to put the transmission back in. Wow. This sucks. I even bought a trans jack to make life easier. Easier … are you kidding me? I switched from that to a floor jack and back, twice (with the trans hanging under the truck). Jenna couldn’t understand the cursing, and why I hadn’t got anything accomplished in 45 minutes. Finally, with some extra long bolts, a piece of Allthread, and a medium (that’s Latin for really big) prybar, “McGyver” got the job done. The test drive was less than stellar. This horrible scraping noise couldn’t be covered up with the factory 4 watt stereo, even with me singing along, so something needed to be done. I truly was fearing the worst: that something was amiss with the throwout bearing (and the old one was already thrown out), and I sure wasn’t looking forward to pulling the trans again. Turns out the tailshaft has a shield around it that must have got whacked when I was taking the unit over to the car wash, and the slip yoke was scraping. Easy fix! Remove driveshaft (this one has a two-piecer, no problem), hit, pry, bend, slam, clearance, rotate, hammer, and reinstall. The truck has got 233,000 miles on it, not a straight panel to be had, crap for a sound system and enough wind noise to deafen you, but: it has wonderful heat and a/c, it’s all paid for, the clutch should last at least another 100K, and chicks dig red trucks!

Our house gates are completed, and Tony did the best job on them. It’s great to see someone still take so much pride in their craftsmanship. I shall include some “after” photos of the front and back soon, as we still are awaiting one shutter. Other than that, I think we’re done, and what a difference!

Jason has now developed an eating disorder. No, not a really major deal, and certainly nothing that will affect his development, at least not too severely. It seems that he won’t let mom or me feed him unless he has a copy of National Dragster on his high chair to peruse. It’s really funny until he starts tearing the pages, so I make sure I have read all issues before he gets to them. He just loves when I make the sound effects to go with the Funny Cars, but his favorite seems to be the motorcycles. He is fascinated by my bike in the garage, and he loves my two-stroke noises, so he always points out the 2-wheelers in each issue. Soon enough he will have his own membership, and I’ll have to beg to borrow his issues. Maybe he’ll just make me do my nitro noises and bike launch sound-effects.

Our American flag is flying proudly out front for this Memorial Day weekend, and I thank all of you who have had a role in keeping our country free. Whether active duty, reserve, a veteran, or a family member .. your sacrifice makes a difference. Though it’s an extra day off for most folks, and a chance to barbeque with your friends, please remember those that gave the most for all of our freedom.

Anyway, we spent the night at Cindy’s house, and Grandma took care of Jason while Jenna and I had an “adult night out” with our friends, the Mitsos. We went to a movie together for the first time in about six months, and actually had dinner without having to take turns chasing Jason around. This morning I put together Cindy’s new furniture and we cleared out a lot from Jenna’s old room. Jason loved watching the fish in the backyard pond, played with his new tool set, and crapped his pants (hey, nobody’s perfect). I took a trip over to the storage lot and fired up the Blackbird just to remember what Rocket Brand race gas smells like. Jenna’s childhood best friend, Brandy, and her husband Mike were in from Northern California, so they stopped by to say hello. They hadn’t seen each other in nearly ten years, so there was lots of hugging and reminiscing. I gave the dog a haircut in the backyard to keep from losing testosterone. Jenna and Brandy got their feet tattooed when they were 17 to profess a lifelong friendship. It’s some Chinese writing that’s supposed to say, “Best Friends”, but I think they were sold a bill of goods. What if the tattoo guy was in a deviant mood and the message really reads, “bad judgment”, “this end up”, “if found, please return to...”, or “I wear a size 6 shoe”. Anyway, the lesson here kids, don’t fall out of touch with someone who is tattooed anywhere on your body. I’m just going to hold out until I hit 50 or so. By then, whoever is around me MUST be a good friend!

Once home, we made our bi-weekly Home Depot list and spent some money. I did my best Bob Villa around the house, and will continue tomorrow. I actually feel like I’m accomplishing some stuff around the homestead. I just wish the surf would pick up so I can drop all the tools and head west!

Stay tuned.

P.S. Sometimes the fans are the best part of my job. Here is a photo of a young man, Jack Hay, whose dad knows my father from work. Maybe I can turn the keys over to young Jack in about 15 years!